


A Reluctant Celebration

by ttacticianmagician



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Birthday, Cats, Felix is a tsundere jerk yet everyone loves him anyway, Fluff, Gen, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Rated T for swearing, Some angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 11:00:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22849045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ttacticianmagician/pseuds/ttacticianmagician
Summary: Before the 20th day of the Pegasus Moon arrived, Felix told everyone in the Blue Lion house not to throw him a birthday party.“Not even a surprise party.” He grumbled. “If there are streamers and confetti and a birthday cake in the dining hall when I walk in, I’m turning around and leaving.”“Wow, Felix.” Sylvain had an awkward grin on his face. “Way to mince words.”---How does someone celebrate their birthday when they hate parties and unwanted attention? Very carefully, of course.
Relationships: Blue Lions Students & Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 2
Kudos: 45





	A Reluctant Celebration

**Author's Note:**

> I'm apparently continuing my trend of writing long birthday fics that I end up posting a few days after the birthday. Oh well. I had fun writing this, so I hope you enjoy this too! Happy (belated) birthday to the best sword boi!

Before the 20th day of the Pegasus Moon arrived, Felix told everyone in the Blue Lion house not to throw him a birthday party.

“Not even a surprise party.” He grumbled. “If there are streamers and confetti and a birthday cake in the dining hall when I walk in, I’m turning around and leaving.”

“Wow, Felix.” Sylvain had an awkward grin on his face. “Way to mince words.”

That smile was wiped away by a death glare from Felix. Despite his friend’s nonchalant attitude towards his ultimatum and further protests from his other classmates, they all seemed to get the point at the end. Which admittedly surprised Felix a bit. Having endured almost a year of birthday planning sessions for other people, he knew just how much the Blue Lions loved to throw parties. That was why he made his reluctance known very early and very clearly, but he didn’t expect them to give up this easily.

It wasn’t that Felix hated birthdays. He just had no strong opinion about them. What he hated more was all the attention and frivolity that came with them. The time he spent partying could be used for more useful tasks, like training. He thought all the presents he received were a waste of money and effort because as a noble of a prominent house, he could probably obtain such items by himself easily. And sometimes those gifts were definitely something he had no want for. Yet he still had to act like he loved every one of them, and thank each giver with a wide smile and profuse gratitude.

(He also hated how birthdays became so lifeless ever since Glenn died and Dimitri lost himself, but he didn’t dare think about that any further.)

So when Felix woke up on a cold, wintry morning, he was looking forward to a peaceful day. The only mention of his birthday so far was a letter from Rodrigue. The piece of paper delivered by a messenger owl wished him a happy 18th birthday, and also included a box with an ornate dagger inside. The dagger itself wasn’t the problem, rather that he was given daggers for his birthday for the past four years or so. It was just another sign that the old man was out of touch with his son, and had no clue what to give him. Still, it was a nice dagger. Maybe he could sell it and put the money towards something more useful.

His dream of a peaceful birthday was dashed the moment he stepped outside. Felix almost collided into someone running in front of him. That person yelped and… meowed?

“Oh! Sorry, Felix!” Ashe exclaimed. In his arm was a grey-brown tabby cat with a white muzzle, belly, and legs. A Fraldarius shorthair, if Felix remembered correctly. The feline yowled again, obviously complaining about being manhandled.

“What are you doing to the cat?” Felix asked.

“Uh, I volunteered to acclimate some of the new monastery cats to humans. But this one doesn’t seem too friendly.”

“Some cats are like that.” Felix shrugged. “If you want it to warm up to you, give it some food.”

“Food, huh?” Ashe glanced down at the cat. It glared at him in return and squirmed in its arms. He then lifted his eyes back up, meeting Felix’s blank stare with a sheepish one.

“I have some cat treats in my pouch, but I can’t reach it. Would you be able to feed it for me?” He gestured down to his belt. 

Felix was about to object, saying that he had training to do and didn’t have time to deal with a cat, but the idea did appeal to him. As long as he made this quick, no one would have to know that he secretly had a soft spot for cats. So he grabbed some dried fish out of Ashe’s pouch and dangled it in front of the cat’s face. The cat sniffed the morsel, then Felix’s hand, and scarfed it down without hesitation. Once it finished, it nuzzled its forehead against Felix’s open palm and purred. Such an adorable sight elicited a faint smile from Felix.

“Aw, I think it likes you a lot better!” Ashe’s smile was a lot bigger than Felix’s.

“Only because I fed it.” Felix quickly slapped his usual scowl back onto his face. 

“Hey, but since this cat likes you so much, could you take care of it for a little while? There’s still a lot more cats I need to socialize with.”

“Wait, what-”

“Thank you so much, Felix! I know I can count on you! Here’s the rest of the treats if you want them.”

Ashe plopped the cat and his pouch into Felix’s arms darted away without another word. Felix just stared after him, dumbfounded. He shouldn’t have agreed to help Ashe in the first place. Now he was stuck with an animal that wasn’t even his.

Or was he? Ashe vanished so quickly, he probably wouldn’t notice if Felix didn’t have the cat anymore. He could just claim that the cat ran off if Ashe asked about it later. So Felix set the cat down on the ground, thinking that it would stay out of his way. Unfortunately for him, it trailed after him on his way to the training ground. Felix had half a mind to leave it someplace where it couldn’t follow him, but in the end, he let it be. It wouldn’t hurt to have someone watching his training.

It turned out that he and the cat weren’t the only ones in the training grounds this early in the morning. Dedue was also present, wailing away at some training dummies with a pair of gauntlets that Felix had never seen him wield before. They had a wooden grip and sported a single, jagged-edged blade at the end. As he observed them and their relentless assault on their inanimate victim, he slowly realized that they were killer knuckles, a weapon that wasn’t normally stocked by Garreg Mach. How exactly did Dedue come to possess them?

Dedue paused his training to glance up at Felix. A beat passed before he spoke. “Felix.”

“Dedue.” He replied. The two of them never said much to each other because of their differences. While the man of Duscur was wholly devoted to His Highness, Felix wanted nothing to do with Dimitri. That disparity in loyalty sometimes led to spats that didn’t end well for either of them. Although their mutual hostility dwindled with time, they still didn’t prefer each other’s company unless it was necessary.

Today was different, however. For one, Dimitri was nowhere to be seen. It was rare for Dedue to not be by his side.

“Why aren’t you with your master?” Felix tried not to let his distaste for the boar prince slip into his voice, just this once.

“His Highness is resting.” Dedue replied back just as tersely. “These past few weeks have not been kind to him.”

“I can tell.” Basically everyone who had a passing acquaintance with the boar noticed that he was losing his mind. Then again, with all the crazy occurrences this school year, it was hard not to go crazy in some way, Felix included.

“I’m surprised you managed to get him to sleep.”

“It was difficult.” Dedue admitted. “Last night was the first night I succeeded without much intervention.”

Felix couldn’t help but nod. He knew just how hard it was to force the boar to do something that he didn’t want to do. But more importantly, now that they were on more friendly terms, he could ask Dedue the question that had been bugging him for the last several minutes. “Where did you get those killer knuckles?”

“I made them.” Dedue raised up his gauntlets so Felix could examine them better. They definitely had a homemade quality to them, but they looked functional enough. Better than functional, even. They could probably tear through a knight’s armor in the right hands. Felix knew that Dedue used to be a blacksmith’s son and had more knowledge about forging and crafting than everyone else. But these sorts of occasions still caught him off guard, and forced him to give Dedue some begrudging respect.

“But there’s something wrong with the gauntlets. They do not feel right in my hands.”

Felix was about to say that they looked fine when he was punching the dummy to smithereens, but held his tongue. “Give them here. I can take a closer look at them.”

Dedue slipped the gauntlets off and passed them to Felix. Felix turned them over, scanning for any defects of flaws. There was none that he became aware of just by looking at them. To really evaluate them, he would have to try them out. He grasped the gauntlets by the handles and jabbed at thin air. The twin blades swung around with little resistance and felt like a natural extension of his fists. Almost as if they were made just for him…

“I know what the problem is.” Dedue suddenly proclaimed. “I made them too small for me, but they fit you perfectly.”

Felix stopped to narrow his eyes at Dedue. He never was any good at hiding his true intentions, a flaw that didn’t hinder his duty as a prince’s retainer but didn’t do him any favors now. With such transparency, Felix could tell what Dedue was going to say next. He should have stopped him, as he explicitly refused such favors for his birthday, but a selfish part of him really liked these gauntlets.

“You should keep them. I have no use for weapons that I cannot use.”

“Hmph.” Felix said in place of thanks. “Next time, be more careful with your measurements. You can’t keep wasting forging material, then pawning your rejects on other people.”

“Noted.” Dedue did not sound disappointed at the lack of gratitude. He supposed that Dedue already anticipated such a response. Good. It made their conversation less awkward then.

Felix spent a little while longer in the training grounds with his new killer knuckles, with the cat and Dedue for company. Dedue at first kept to himself with his old pair of steel gauntlets and a different training dummy. But eventually, they decided to practice maneuvers with a quick spar or two. Those spars lasted longer than Felix thought they would, and it was time for classes before he knew it.

The cat followed him into the classroom. No one else paid it any mind, not even when it curled up in Felix’s lap and slept. It was as if the others expected this special guest to grace their lessons today. Felix himself ignored the cat in order to listen to Professor Byleth’s lecture and to take notes. Well, he mostly ignored it. He couldn’t help but pat its head a few times when he was bored and when he thought no one was watching.

During a break between classes, some of the Blue Lions gathered around Felix. He at first feared that they were going to make a big deal over his birthday, but they were instead making a big deal over his cat. Ashe was especially pleased over how well it got along with its new human friend.

“Are you going to give it a name?” He asked with a big smile plastered on his face.

“Why would I name it? It’s not mine.” Felix stared at the cat, which was now lounged around on his desk and basked in the many hands that stroked its fur.

“You can’t just keep on calling it ‘the cat’ or whatever else!” Annette was one of those people petting the cat. “It bonded with you, so you have to name it.”

“Bonded is a strong word.”

“If you don’t want to name it, then I’ll do the honors.” Sylvain gave him a wink. “How about Chestnut? Because it’s hard on the outside, but soft on the inside. Just like a certain guy I know.”

“I’m not like that at all. And that’s a stupid name.”

“How about Rocky then?” Ashe piped up. “Because you think you’re tough, inside and out.”

“That’s also stupid. You all are terrible at naming cats.”

“Heh, it sounds like you have experience with this.” Annette giggled.

“I don’t.” Felix lied. “And I don’t appreciate being compared with a chestnut or a rock.”

“Hey, no  _ hard _ feelings, kay?” Sylvain jeered, then ducked to avoid an incoming book.

Despite his act of violence, his classmates kept on coming up with weird names for the cat. Felix had to put an end to it or else the rest of the day would continue like this. "If it'll make you guys shut up, the cat's name is Astram."

"Like the legendary wielder of Mercurius?" Ashe asked while tilting his head.

"Like him. But not for the reasons you think. It just sounds a lot better than your other dumb names."

Actually, he named the cat Astram exactly for the reasons Ashe thought. He just didn't want to admit it out loud, or else he would never hear the end of it.

"I think it's a good name!" Annette exclaimed as she scratched the cat's chin. "Who's a good boy? Yes! It's you, Astram!"

"Annette, Astram is a cat, not a dog." Sylvain gave her a puzzled side glance.

"So? He still enjoys this all the same."

"Come to think of it." Felix turned his attention towards Ashe. "This cat doesn't need any acclimation. It's already used to humans. It loves humans, even."

"O-oh." Ashe turned his head away. He was blushing a bit from being found out. "That's true. I just thought you would enjoy his company for your- for today."

"... I don't mind it." Felix mumbled so softly, the others could barely hear him. He could use someone that adored him for simple reasons, like food. Especially when he had a feeling that he was going to be subjected to more incognito birthday celebrations later today.

The rest of their classes passed by without much commotion. Felix occasionally looked up from his note-taking to study his classmates instead. He had no doubt that Sylvain and Ingrid were going to give him something, as they have done throughout the years. Annette and Mercedes were obviously trying very hard to plot without seeming suspicious. They often glanced his way, whispered to each other, and averted their gaze when he stared back. The two girls were the most enthusiastic party planners in the class, so he couldn't help but worry what they were up to. And Dimitri…

The boar kept to himself for most of the day. His night of rest, forced upon him by Dedue, did little to erase his eyebags and general haggard appearance. Felix got the impression that there was more on his mind than a former friend's birthday, so he wasn't expecting anything from him. The boar would probably ruin his so far peaceful day anyway, either by saying something awkward or by breaking something.

(Still, he wouldn't mind if Dimitri at least acknowledged his birthday. Just as a sign that he hadn't lost himself completely.)

Felix found out what Annette and Mercedes were planning later on, right after lectures were finished. They confronted him before he even left the classroom.

"Hey, Felix!" Annette bounced up to him with her usual chipper attitude. "Could you help Mercie and me out in the kitchen today?"

"Why do you need my help?" Felix asked while he shoved his notes into his bag. The cat next to him yawned.

"Because you’re really good at cutting vegetables?” That sounded more like another question than an answer.

“I still don’t see why you need  _ me _ for that.”

“Come on, Felix. Just this once? I promise it has nothing to do with your birthday or anything.”

Felix stared down at the miniature mage with a raised eyebrow. Now her request definitely seemed suspicious when she put it like that. She also realized how fishy she sounded, judging from her exasperated sigh.

“Ok fine, it maybe has something to do with your birthday. Just a little bit. But it’ll be just the three of us hanging out in the kitchen. No parties. And…”

“And?”

“AndI’llsingforyou!” Annette spoke so quickly, her words became an unintelligible mess. Felix could barely make out what she said. But what he could figure out piqued his interest.

“Are you going to sing the steaks and cakes song? Or is it something new?”

“Ugh! Don’t make me regret this, Felix!” Annette pouted as her face turned bright red like a tomato. She was supposed to look angry, but to Felix, she just looked adorable. Despite their unusual lyrics, her songs were downright catchy for some unfathomable reason. Felix didn’t have a musical inclination by any means, yet here he was, agreeing to help cut vegetables because of her offer.

Luckily, his work in the kitchen was easy and stress-free, like Annette promised. Felix thought slicing and dicing food would make for a dull time, but Mercedes apparently had a lot of things to cook. And as Felix suspected, Annette wasn’t very helpful in their endeavors. She tried her best, of course, but she was so clumsy, she ended up making more work for the two of them. She dropped dishes, mixed up ingredients, and even set a pot of boiling water on fire. Mercedes eventually put her on dish-washing duty, which seemed like the safest task to entrust her with. While Annette scrubbed away at pots and pans, she hummed a cute tune to herself, complete with an equally cute shuffle of her feet.

Felix shouldn’t have mentioned anything, but he couldn’t stop himself. “Is that my song you’re humming?”

“Wah!” Annette dropped the pot she was washing, which landed with a resounding clang. She turned around with furrowed brows and a frown on her face, and she was flushed red from head to toe. 

“That’s not- It’s not finished yet! Forget you heard me!”

“Will it be finished soon? The food is almost done cooking.”

“Uh.” Annette glanced towards Mercedes to confirm what Felix said. Her friend gave her a nod in return.

“Well, it’s finished enough. But it’s dumb. You’re going to laugh at it, and then I’m going to die of a million regrets, and-”

“I promise I won’t laugh at it.” Felix interrupted her panicked remarks. 

Annette gave him a hard stare, like she was trying to gauge the truthfulness in his words. Felix stared back, unphased by her steely eyes. It wasn’t like he could be intimidated by such a short and fiesty girl anyway. After a brief staring contest of sorts, she sighed and closed her eyes.

“Ok fine. But if I hear even one giggle out of you…”

She took a deep breath. Out of her mouth came her usual lovely singing voice that belonged in the church’s choir, at the very least. But the lyrics. Felix didn’t expect to hear those words on those lips, and it took all his willpower to not laugh.

“ _ Here he comes, Felix Fraldarius and his trusty blade, _

_ And with a flick of his silver sword, the day is saved. _

_ Like a monster, Felix cuts and then he chops _

_ Tasty vegetables that are thrown into a pot~ _

Oh goddess, I can’t do this!”

Annette buried her face in her hands. The color of her burning red cheeks stained her fingers as well, making her shame plainly visible. That embarrassment must have infected Felix as well, as his skin took on that same crimson hue. He pressed a hand against his face to calm himself down.

“Annette-”

“I know, I know, it’s terrible! You must be thinking, ‘What a terrible birthday present! Who would want some weirdo composing a song about them cutting vegetables?’ Goddess, just take me now!”

“I thought it was cute.” Mercedes piped up, unperturbed by the two blushing people next to her.

“... Same here.” Felix eventually admitted. He managed to recollect himself enough to speak with his usual cool tone. “Although, do you really think of me as a monster?”

Annette gasp and went wide-eyed for a moment. “I- No! I mean, kinda? When you’re fighting enemies, you’re a bit scary with your sword. And you had that same energy with a kitchen knife, so.”

She didn’t finish her thought, instead opting to sink her face into her palms again. Felix sighed again. Annete was obviously so traumatized over this song, it may take her days before she could speak to him normally. Still, he actually didn’t hate this. It was kinda flattering, in a weird way.

“Oh! The pies are done!” Mercedes thankfully dispelled the tension by remembering that they were actually cooking something now. She and Felix pulled several meat pies out of the oven and set them on the counter to cool. They were still piping hot, but they made Felix hungry by sight and smell alone. He knew that they were Mercedes’s birthday presents to him, but the fact that he helped her create them pretty much killed off any irritation he might have felt. What bothered him more was the number of pies. There were too many for the three of them to eat, which meant…

“It looks like we arrived on time!” Sylvain practically shouted as he entered the dining hall with Ingrid and Ashe. He inhaled deeply to take in the delicious smell of buttery crust and savory meat.

“I told you guys not to throw me a party.” Felix grumbled. He should have expected a trap like this. And he fell right into it, thanks to Annette’s siren call.

“It’s not really a party. We didn’t hang up our usual decorations, for one thing.” Ingrid pointed out.

“Yeah. Try thinking of it as normal get-together?” Ashe suggested.

“Especially when you helped make the food.” Mercedes carried the meat pies to the table that everyone gathered around. “Don’t you want to share what we’ve made to our friends?”

Felix grunted as he sat down. He wanted to get this over as quickly as possible, so they had less time to turn this into an actual party. He dug into the meat pie with big, ravenous bites, and enjoyed every mouthful that he took. Perhaps the fact that he helped in its creation made it taste better than normal, or maybe its wonderful flavor was due to Mercedes’s caring touch. Whatever the cause was, the meal put him in a good enough mood to sneak tidbits of meat to the cat that refused to leave his side.

The conversations around him were surprisingly not focused on the birthday boy, but on other mundane topics. They must have been mindful of his sensitivity and tried not to give him any reason to leave. That suited him just fine. In fact, once he settled down, he actually enjoyed their company. It was a nice change of pace to be surrounded by warmth, especially when the boar wasn’t here to mess it up.

“Oh, Felix, before you leave, happy birthday.”

Sylvain pulled something out of his bag and dropped it unceremoniously in front of Felix. The cat protested with a loud yelp. Even though the offending object was obviously a birthday present, Felix wasn’t terribly bothered by it. Sylvain was one of the only people allowed to actually give him something, on the account that they had a tradition of giving each other joke gifts ever since they were little. On Sylvain’s 20th birthday, Felix had bequeathed him a charm that was supposed to ward off ‘surprises’ from the numerous women he spent the night with. Sylvain laughed at that, but also turned a glorious shade of bright red.

Felix was kind of dreading what kind of present Sylvain got in revenge. Whatever his gift was, it was bottled shaped and covered with colorful paper and ribbons. When he shook it, some sort of liquid sloshed inside. As he unwrapped it, he left the paper and ribbons aside for Astram to play with. He honestly expected to see wine or some other sort of alcohol, not a bottle of hair oil, with glittery, elastic hair ties wrapped around its neck.

“The fuck, Sylvain?” He held the bottle by the neck like he was about to club his friend with it.

“I just thought that your long, luscious locks could use some self-care. You won’t win any hearts with whatever basic stuff you’re using.” Sylvain chuckled. 

“And why do you think I care?” Felix rolled his eyes. He unscrewed the cap on the bottle anyway to sniff at its contents. It smelled pleasant at least, if not a bit too flowery. Definitely some high quality (and expensive) stuff.

“Sylvain! You can’t just say things like that!” Annette scowled. Felix couldn’t help but notice how indignant she sounded.

“Why not? It’s true! He just hides his terrible hair by tying it up in a bun all the time. Which, by the way, could use some bedazzlement once in a while.”

Felix pulled one of those ‘bedazzlements’ off the bottle. Not only did the bands sparkle in the sunlight, they were attached to colorful crystal beads and wooden shapes like butterflies and hearts. These hair ties were obviously meant for little girls, or women with childish tastes. He tried to imagine himself wearing one, but couldn’t think about it too long. The mere image made his cheeks blush in embarrassment.

“Oh, so you do like them?” Sylvain noticed his redness and took the opportunity to tease him more. Felix pulled at the hair tie to shoot it into his face. The table broke out into laughter as Sylvain yelped and rubbed at where he was struck.

“Felix, I got you something too.” Ingrid handed him a small paper-wrapped parcel. “I know you don’t like being told this, but happy birthday.”

“Thank you.” Felix muttered under his breath so only she could hear him. Ingrid was the only person besides Sylvain that was allowed to give him anything for his birthday, and she didn’t abuse her privilege like he did. Her gifts usually weren't on the expensive side, but they were practical. He couldn't say no to practical things, despite his usual talk about not needing anything for his birthday. This year, she had gotten him a two-toned whetstone, something that Felix didn’t expect at all. 

“This is…” He was about to say ‘way too expensive’, but swallowed those words at the last moment. Even he knew that bringing up Ingrid’s less-than-ideal wealth was not a good idea.

“How did you get this? Aren’t these supposed to be rare?”

“Linhardt has a bunch of them, surprisingly. Don’t ask me how or why he has, but I got one from him by trading a book for it.”

“I hope that was a worthwhile trade then.”

“Well, it’s for you, so yes. It was worthwhile.”

Felix glanced up from the stone to stare at Ingrid. She looked completely serious about what she said. That kind of flattery tinged his cheeks red. He dug back into his meat pie before anyone could comment on his flustered appearance.

Except no one did. They resumed their mirthful chatter, like they didn’t just successfully snuck an unexpected birthday party into Felix’s day, complete with presents. He should have been upset, but he found himself lingering with his friends even after his food was done. He didn’t say much, just listened and watched their antics. Occasionally he responded to questions aimed at him, or chimed in with some smarmy remark, but this otherwise felt like an ordinary convergence, like Ashe had mentioned earlier.

Still, he grew restless. Felix stood up abruptly once he found a good time to leave.

“I’m going to train. Need to work off all this food.” He stood up while grabbing Sylvain’s and Ingrid’s gifts.

“Hold on, Felix-”

Sylvain’s warning came too late. As soon as Felix opened the door, he practically ran into Dimitri and Dedue, who were on their way in.

“Oh!” Dimitri blinked, then peered around Felix’s shoulders. “Did I miss the party? I do apologize for being late. The business I had to take care of took longer than I thought.”

Felix noticed that he was addressing the crowd behind him. He suppressed the urge to shove him out of the way and instead corrected him with a harsh tone. “It’s not a party.”

“Sorry. I know you don’t like that word.” Dimitri grimaced. “How did the, uh, gathering go?”

“What do you want, boar?” Felix was not in the mood to entertain him. If he didn’t cut this conversation short, then Dimitri was going to give him some sappy birthday wishes that Felix would have to accept because the rest of the Blue Lions were watching. The thought of taking his niceties at face value made him want to retch. 

“I just wanted to say happy birthday.” Dimitri spoke as if he didn’t know Felix was hating every moment of this. “And I got you something.”

He unstrapped a long package that was strapped to his back. Felix could tell just from a glance that underneath the wrapping paper was a sword. Of course the boar prince would give him a sword, because he didn’t know what else to give him.

“Well? Aren’t you going to open it?” Dimitri asked while handing his present over.

“I’m heading to the training grounds.” Felix replied without even looking down at the weighty item in his arms. “Get out of the way, boar.”

“Of course.” Dimitri wore a downcast expression as he stepped aside to let Felix through. “Don’t let me stop you. See you later then?”

A sound of derision escaped Felix’s throat. He strolled past him without offering a single glance. Behind him, voices either whispered or exclaimed in indignation. He didn’t care. Once Felix and Astram descended down the flight of stairs that led away from the dining hall, he couldn’t hear them anymore.

Yet, their complaints still haunted him as he first made his way to his room to drop off his presents. Maybe it was these voices that compelled him to finally unwrap Dimitri’s sword in the privacy of his own bedroom. A brilliant flash of silver greeted him once he tore away the paper. The beautiful blade before him was familiar but unfamiliar at the same time. He ran his finger along the metal, tracing the delicate patterns etched in it like elegant handwriting. 

Felix was pretty sure that he had given this Sword of Zoltan to Dimitri for his birthday. So why was he giving it back? And why did it feel so different? He should have stuck around longer to interrogate the boar, but there was no use going back now. As he stood up to give it a swing, a small piece of paper fluttered to the ground. Felix picked it up and, after a cursory scan, realized that Dimitri had provided the answer to his questions anyway.

_ Felix, _

_ I’m writing this note because I know you won’t give me the chance to explain myself. As you probably guessed, this is the Sword of Zoltan that you gave me for my 18th birthday. But I feel as though I don’t deserve it. You first claimed that you would only give me this sword if I bested you in a duel, then you gave it to me anyway, after I lost. Not only that, but I ended up breaking this sword shortly afterwards, as you predicted. I had it reforged to be more powerful than ever, but I still think it’s better in your hands. _

_ I know that you’ve noticed that I have not been in the best of moods lately. I am aware of how strained our relationship is, and how difficult it is for you to tolerate me. But I hope that we can repair the bond we once had and make it stronger than before, like this sword. It would mean a lot to me if we could make this happen. _

_ Best wishes, _

_ Dimitri _

Felix stared at the note with blurry eyes. Damn that boar. Of course he knew Felix well enough to have the foresight to slip this note into his present. Although the letter touched some part of his heart that he didn’t know was still alive, it wasn’t enough to change his mind. Calling his bloodthirsty and vengeful persona a foul mood was putting it much too lightly, like it wasn’t an obstacle that this peace offering couldn’t surmount. Even if Felix agreed to put the past behind him, what good would his friendship do for the boar? He would just become another yes-man that he was sure that Dimitri would chew up and spit out, sooner or later. Actually, it was just sooner now, as evident from his brief moments of bloodlust.

(Yet, Dimitri remembered. Maybe Felix shouldn’t have been so hasty in leaving. He should have at least thanked him for the present.)

Felix wanted to tear the note up and toss it away, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He instead placed it on his desk, tucked in between some books. A bout in the training grounds should clear his muddled mind and give him a chance to test out his new sword. As he left his room, Astram jumped onto the spot on his bed where he once sat and curled up contently.

More people were in the training grounds at this time of day. To Felix’s relief, none of them paid any him any heed, nor was there anyone he recognized. Scratch that. He spotted the unmistakable mint green hair and cyan eyes of his professor in the corner, swinging her sword at a training dummy that was beaten up by Dedue earlier in the day. Felix walked over to her, his footsteps alerting her to his presence. She glanced up from her practice with her usual stoic expression.

“Felix.”

“Professor.”

“I hear it is your birthday.”

Felix twitched. He hadn’t recalled mentioning this to Byleth before, but that didn't mean she didn't hear that from someone else. The Blue Lions no doubt tittered about it in the classroom, where she probably overhead them. He pushed aside his usual callousness to respond politely for once.

“It is.”

“Happy birthday.” She didn’t smile as she spoke. Felix didn’t expect her to. He anticipated her leaving things at that, but her eyes gained a certain wistfulness as she continued on.

“I didn’t get you a real present, but would this suffice?” Byleth put away her training sword to pull the Sword of the Creator off her belt. Felix recoiled in shock, not understanding what she meant by this action.

“Professor, are you seriously giving this to me?”

“Just for a little bit.” Byleth held out the sword’s hilt towards him. “I know you like swords, so I thought you would like to try a sword that you have never wielded.”

Felix regarded the glowing orange sword and her words with disbelief. Calling this holy blade ‘a sword he never wielded’ was the understatement of the century. There were many reasons as to why he hadn’t asked to use it before, the most prominent one taking the shape of a wicked Demonic Beast. It simply wasn’t safe for anyone but Byleth to have it, and here she was, ignoring all prior warnings. 

The Sword of the Creator was tempting him, however. It was made with the same material as House Fraldarius’s Heroes’ Relic, the Aegis Shield, yet it had a different sort of feeling. It made sense that they felt different, as one was a shield and the other was a weapon, but there was something else. Felix couldn’t describe it well, but it was like it carried an aura of authority that lit a spirited but confident fire in his core. And he hadn’t even touched it yet.

That strange feeling went away once he gripped its handle and Byleth released her own grip. The sword lost its orange glow and became dead weight. Felix had to use two hands to hold it off the ground. He attempted to swing it, but only succeeded in lifting it up to his chest. His muscles would probably tear apart if he tried to do anything besides holding it, and he came here to train, not to destroy his body.

“I can’t use this.” Felix proclaimed. Byleth nodded wordlessly and took her sword back. The moment she wrapped her fingers around its hilt, its fiery orange glow returned to life. She hefted it around like it was made of nothing as she gave it a test swing or two. Seeing her wield that wonderful blade so effortlessly shot a pang of envy through Felix’s heart.

“I’m sorry that this didn’t work out.” She said once she finished.

“There’s no need to apologize.” Felix shouldn’t have gotten his hopes up in the first place. “May I ask something else of you?”

“Yes. Of course.”

“Spar with me with the Sword of Creator.”

Byleth hesitated. The aforementioned blade fidgeted in her grasp. “Are you certain? I could seriously injure you.”

“Have more confidence in me. My swordsmanship has gotten better since we first met, hasn’t it? I won’t go down that easily.”

“That is true. Today is your birthday, after all.”

That wasn’t what Felix meant, but he decided to let that comment go. “Besides, I have a new sword I would like to test against a formidable opponent.”

“Which sword?”

Felix revealed the reforged Sword of Zoltan by pulling it out his sheath. Byleth stared at it with a curious expression. “That is Dimitri’s sword, isn’t it?”

“It was.” Felix answered. “He gave it back to me.”

“For your birthday?”

“Are you interrogating me or are you going to spar with me?”

Byleth tilted her head ever so slightly. Was that a sign of amusement? Felix lifted his sword to show that he was ready for the battle. That silent signal spurred her to kick her feet off the ground and lunge at him.

The two sword fighters clashed in a spectacular display of ability and determination. The Sword of Zoltan sang in Felix’s hands, standing tall against the legendary Sword of the Creator. It moved exactly where he wanted to be, in order to parry blows and deliver them. Yet Byleth did not hold back, especially with her signature sword’s reputation at risk. She transformed it into its whip form several times during the match, using her longer reach to her advantage. Felix did his best to dodge those strikes, but he admittedly didn’t have much practice dodging a weapon like this. When he reacted a millisecond too slowly, the Sword of the Creator wrapped around his blade and yanked it out of his hands.

Now that he wasn’t enthralled by their battle, Felix noticed that a crowd had gathered to watch their fight. He recognized some of the Blue Lions among them, including a familiar blond teenager. When their gaze met, blue eyes turned away and disappeared among the people.

Felix turned his attention back towards Byleth once he picked his sword off the ground. “Again.”

“As you wish.”

Although Felix learned from his previous mistake, the next fight still ended in a loss for him. And the next. And the next. By the time they were finished, the sun was setting and the huddled watchers had grown bored of consistently one-sided matches and departed. That was fine by Felix. He didn’t need an outsider’s remarks to know how well he did. Yes, despite his string of losses, he counted the fact that he held his own against the full might of the Sword of the Creator a victory. 

Apparently, the Professor did too. “You performed admirably. It’s obvious that you have grown a lot. Perhaps you will beat me someday.”

Felix felt like that day was still far off. But that only drove him forward, not dragged him down. “I thank you for going all out against me. By knowing that I can face you at your best, I feel like I can take on anyone else.”

“Don’t get too complacent.” Byleth shook her head. “The world is a big place. There are definitely people stronger than me out there. Do you want some water?”

Felix nodded and graciously accepted the waterskin that was offered to him. As he gulped down the soothing liquid, he felt Byleth’s piercing gaze boring through his skin. He pulled the flask away from his mouth and wiped away the remaining droplets around his lips.

“What is it?” He asked. Usually when she stared at him like that, she had a question that she was reluctant to voice. It was up to him to kickstart the conversation.

“Why did you not want a birthday party?”

He didn’t expect to hear that coming from her. It took him a moment to come up with an adequate response. “I don’t like the attention.”

“Yet you didn’t mind the attention that our spar attracted.”

“That’s different. They were paying attention to our strength we accumulated, the skills we honed. With a birthday party, we’re just celebrating the day we were born. Big deal.”

“I don’t believe it’s just that. A birthday means another year of living and surviving our ordeals, doesn’t it?”

Now it was Felix’s turn to stare at her. Byleth was being oddly introspective for someone that didn’t celebrate birthdays until she came to the monastery. Did she talk to someone about birthdays beforehand or did she have something else on her mind?

“I suppose.” He replied simply. 

“That seems like a worthy cause to celebrate.” Byleth continued on. “Especially with friends and family. After all, you don’t know if you will celebrate with them next year. Or in the future.”

Ah. That was what was bothering her. The death of her father must still weigh heavily in her mind, and she must have persistent regrets that twisted her views about everyday things like birthdays. Felix couldn’t help but sympathize, having gone through similar grief when his brother died. But it still wasn’t exactly what he wanted to hear right now. 

“I know that.” He sighed. “But I still don’t like parties. I don’t like the forced attention, the fake gratitude I have to give for presents I have no use for. It would be easier for me if I could be honest, and everyone could be honest with me.”

“Do you think that others are not honest with you?”

“I know that the boar isn’t.” For reasons that weren’t Felix’s fault. “And the others… I’m sure that they only went through the motions for me because they celebrated everyone else’s birthday. They couldn’t admit they dislike me outright by excluding me from their festivities.”

“You think they dislike you?” Byleth wore a worried expression on her face, a rare occurrence. 

“Surely they must, with how badly I treat them. Especially with how I treat the boar.”

He didn’t know why he was saying all this to Byleth. This wasn’t her burden to carry. He knew how difficult he was to work with, and he was fine with that. It was just how he was, and to change himself was akin to lying to himself. And yet, he had to get these words off his chest, now that Byleth’s probing questions brought them to light.

The professor shook her head after taking a moment to contemplate. “I must disagree with you. Your friends care about you. If they didn’t, they would throw you a big flashy party like the others, without taking your feelings into consideration. They wanted to ensure that you were happy.” 

Felix opened his mouth to argue with her, but couldn’t find the right words. She was right. Ashe, Dedue, Annette, and Mercedes gave him their presents without their usual fanfare. Actually, they went out of their way to give their presents in the most stealthy, non-birthday manner possible And Sylvain, Ingrid, and Dimitri only gave their gifts the normal way because they had done so since childhood, but even they were mindful enough to not let the subject overstay its welcome. There wasn’t a big party in the dining hall filled with tacky birthday decorations. The Blue Lions just organized an ordinary meet-up, accompanied by one of Felix’s favorite dishes that he helped baked so he didn’t feel completely pampered. 

Would he have been happier if they didn’t go through all that trouble and just left him alone the entire day? It was hard to say without having experienced it. If he was to imagine a lonely birthday, he would have to forget everything that happened today. That was a more difficult task than he anticipated. He wasn’t sure if he could ever forget the soft fur of a friendly cat, the soothing motions of a weapon’s swing, Annette's bewitching voice, the mouth-watering flavor of a meat pie, the irreplaceable warmth of friends… Friends that he thought would be better off without him.

“Are you happy about your birthday, Felix?” Byleth asked.

Felix thought about it a little bit longer. And then there were Byleth’s gifts. Not only did she grant him the sparring match of a lifetime, she also ensured that he appreciated everything that the Blue Lions did for him today. Byleth was only part of his life for a blink of an eye compared to his other friends, yet she had more insight about his friendships than he did. It was fitting, he supposed. The professor was good at teaching all sorts of lessons, including ones that weren't taught in a classroom.

“Yes.” He eventually responded with a faint smile on his lips. “I think… I am happy.”


End file.
